i've been couple times talking about pikichu and how i love the way he shows that he likes me. but that doesn't means pikichu is a perfect person. i'm trying hard to keep sensible with these things. i mean, not to over thinking about his kindness. i know it's sounds different, but i'm afraid to face the truth that he could be the one that hurt me deeply. i hate to say that i don't want this happened again with me. not this time. at least not with him.
well, some says that if you are ready to be in love, then you are ready with the broken heart too. i keep thinking am i ready for this? yeah i know it's too late to think about it because i agree with pikichu to have this relationship. i'm in the middle of it and thinking what the hell am i doing now? is that sounds like a confuse bitch?
sometimes, when pikichu is not around me. i wonder what is he doing, does he thinks about me? does he misses me? even if he sits in front of me, i keep wonder what is happens with him. why does he looks at his blackberry repeatedly? does he deleting some messages before i see him? i get curious and jealous and afraid every time i think about him. is that normal? fyi, i never do that things to my ex before. and i hate myself when i think about it. i hate myself because i can't get over it...
-db-
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